Synopsis

A 2009 study published in the journal Aggressive Behavior gives us some really useful, real-world insights into how rough-and-tumble play (often called RTP—like playful wrestling, chasing, or tumbling) between dads and young kids might affect a child’s aggression.

Researchers watched 85 fathers and their children (ages 2 to 6, roughly half boys and half girls) during short, toy-free play sessions recorded right in the families’ homes. This made the observations feel natural and true-to-life. They also asked the dads to fill out questionnaires about how often they engaged in rough play over the past year and about their child’s physical aggressive behaviors (things like hitting, kicking, or pushing others).

The big focus was on who was “in charge” during play—specifically, how dominant the father was (meaning he set the pace, kept things safe and fun, and maintained control without letting it get out of hand). Play sessions were carefully coded to measure this.

Here’s what they found:

• Overall, more frequent rough-and-tumble play was linked to higher levels of physical aggression in the children—but only when the father was less dominant during those interactions.
• When fathers were more dominant (leading confidently, setting clear boundaries, and keeping the energy regulated), the amount of rough play didn’t show any connection to increased aggression. In fact, the researchers suggest this kind of well-guided RTP might actually help kids learn to control their impulses and regulate aggression better over time.
• Boys tended to do more rough play than girls, which fits with some patterns seen in how emotions and physicality are socialized differently.

The study has real strengths: It combined direct video observations with parent reports, took place in everyday home settings (great ecological validity), and used solid stats to control for things like how much time dads spent with kids overall.

Of course, no study is perfect. Because it’s a snapshot in time (cross-sectional), it can’t prove cause-and-effect—one possibility is that more aggressive kids simply prompt more rough play, or that other family factors play a role. Some measures relied on dads’ self-reports, which can have biases, though the observation part helps balance that.

Still, this peer-reviewed research stands out as a trustworthy, thoughtful contribution to understanding child development. It highlights that it’s not rough play itself that’s the issue—it’s the quality of the play, especially when a dad provides strong, positive leadership. This has practical implications for parents, educators, and even early intervention programs aiming to support healthy emotional and behavioral growth in young kids.

The Study

Here’s the whole study:

Citation

Flanders JL, Leo V, Paquette D, Pihl RO, Séguin JR. Rough-and-tumble play and the regulation of aggression: an observational study of father-child play dyads. Aggress Behav. 2009 Jul-Aug;35(4):285-95. doi: 10.1002/ab.20309. PMID: 19431190; PMCID: PMC3283567.

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