Unconditional Parenting | Quote 00702

< Back

Missing Image

Quote

Announcing how we plan to punish children (“Remember, if you do x, then I’ll do y to you”) may salve our conscience because we gave them fair warning, but all we’ve really done is threaten them. We’ve told them in advance exactly how we’ll make them suffer if they fail to obey. This communicates a message of distrust (“I don’t think you’ll do the right thing without the fear of punishment”), leads kids to think of themselves as complying for extrinsic reasons, and emphasizes their powerlessness.

Quote ID: 00702

Author

Alfie Kohn

Source

Unconditional Parenting

Our quote collection is searchable! Use the search box to find what you’re seeking.

Content Creator and Curator at

I'm an early learning speaker, podcaster, content creator, author, and founder of Playvolution HQ and Explorations Early Learning.